no more today
I have this feeling.
It’s the feeling I get when I walk in the door and I hear, “Hi, mom!” from Mags behind the bathroom door. And the echo of the same from Will up from the basement on college break.
It’s a feeling that doesn’t care about how cold I was all day, or the things that pulled me back and forth, or the bummer things, or the meeting that went longer than I hoped.
It’s a feeling that doesn’t care about the pizza pickup that had to be dinner, the gas I forgot I had to get this morning, the cup of water the cats spilled, or the dance class that had me out later than I prefer.
It’s that feeling. That walk in the door feeling. When the work is done and every single thing that matters is at the table. Pizza boxes open. Sodas fizzing. Maggie’s feet on my chair. Will talking about his plans for tomorrow and the next day.
And no matter how the day turned out to be, that is the moment I grab onto at bedtime. I pull it over me like the softest kind of quilt, and I let it put me to sleep. It’s the feeling I have in that perfect moment when there’s no more today, and the work of tomorrow can wait its turn.
~originally publiched January 4, 2017